Tag: humility

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7 Learnings From 7 Decades

It is true.  My birth certificate, passport and driver’s license all agree.  I’ve lived 7 decades.  Most of the time, I don’t feel like what I imagined 70 to feel like when I was in my 50’s.  But, it is true. I’m there.  I could write 70 things I’ve learned in 70 years.  But you wouldn’t read them.  So, maybe you will read just these seven.

Live Authentically – The easiest thing to be in the world is yourself.  The hardest thing to be is what others want you to be or to try to mimic someone else. Your fingerprints are uniquely different from the other 8 billion people on this earth. Just be yourself.  Be in tune with your values and passions.  Learn what fulfills you.  Prioritize what brings you peace.  Self-awareness is one of the keys to living authentically.  

Live with Intentionality – Purposeless living is meaningless living.  I’ve spent at least the last 50 years being very intentional about my relationship to my wife, Linda.  Linda and I were intentional with parenting our three children.  We were purposeful about starting a church that had a clear mission and focus.  We’ve been deliberate about our health.  I’ve been specific as to how I would grow my photography skills.  I’ve embraced aging and planning for the legacy that I want to leave behind.  And by the way, intentionality should never be confused with intentions.  As Henry Ford said, “You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.”   

Listening is a Key to Success – There are many aspects and measurements for success.  I could list a dozen  reasons that success follows some and not others.  But the top one is listening.  David Augsburger, my wife’s late uncle, wrote it this way: “Being heard is so close to being loved that, for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.”  Leaders, parents, marriage partners, politicians and friends are successful when they learn how to carefully listen.  Listening to those different than you in age, views, values and beliefs. Listening matters. It really matters.

Love Unconditionally – This is how I’m loved by God. It is a life-long process of learning to accept and give that kind of love.  Love without strings attached is special.  Not based on what someone does for you in return, this love is selfless.  It’s the key to good mental, emotional and spiritual health.  Receiving and giving unconditional love provides a sense of security in both childhood and adulthood.  No human relationship is perfect.  So, accepting and giving unconditional love involves acceptance and forgiveness.  I’ve discovered that only God can ultimately give us the strength and inner resources to love this way.

Letting Go Can Be Better Than Hanging On – This can be counter intuitive.  We naturally want to hang on to the familiar and comfortable.  It takes courage and self-awareness that something is not serving us anymore.  For me, it started with a decision to either stay at home in Oregon and go to a local college or move across the country and attend college and graduate school in Virginia.  While pastoring my first church in upstate New York, there were decisions to be made.  Do I persevere beyond the seven years of a difficult and toxic environment or let go of the familiar to move 1,300 miles away to an unfamiliar setting to live out a life-long dream of starting a new church with no guarantee of success?  Again, after more than two decades of unprecedented growth and success, should I let go of my lead role in the organization I started to let an untested younger leader lead?  No matter if it is parenting children into adulthood, leaving the younger years behind to embrace the unknown of middle or mature years, letting go has ultimately proven to be better than hanging on.  There is power in letting go.

Learn How to Grow Your Fruit On the Trees of Others – This is one of my greatest joys at this stage of my journey.  Tasting the fruit growing on the trees of my successors and younger leaders is the best.  Recently, I was so awed to witness 20 of our top city leaders (city manager, fire chief, police chief, finance director, etc.) all listening to my successor teach on servant leadership at our monthly business leaders’ luncheon. For nearly three decades, I have planted seeds, watered them and tended to relationships with many of those leaders and their predecessors. Yet it was the growing connection of my successor with the current city manager that led him to bring his entire team to grow their leadership skills at our church.  To know that I planted seeds that have grown into productive fruit-bearing nourishment for our top city leaders and thousands of others every weekend is so much better than the limits of keeping it all for myself and doing it all myself.

Live With the End in Mind – Not just now at age 70, but for several decades, I’ve been asking this question of myself and many others at funerals I lead, “What do you want to be remembered for as a spouse, parent, grandparent, neighbor, leader?”  You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you could make decisions today that may very well change the ending.  If you only live in your default mode, you may not be remembered for what you wish. Forward-thinking legacy-leaving individuals and leaders plan for both their future and the future of things and people they value.  As a labor/delivery nurse for 33 years, my wife Linda always encouraged her new parents upon discharge from the birth center to remember “the future is in your hands.”  What outcomes do I want for this child, this family, this job, this role?  Habit 2 of Covey’s “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” is to begin with the end in mind.  This learning is pivotal for your physical, mental, emotional, relational and spiritual health.  It may sound obvious, but if you don’t have an end goal in mind, how on earth are you going to get there?

These seven learnings above, have brought me to a place of great contentment, inner peace, and satisfaction at this point of my journey.  Whether I have two years or two decades left in my journey, I’m filled with confidence that I’ve lived out God’s purpose for me well, I’ve left a significant contribution to those around me, and I have no regrets. So, on to the next decade of purposeful living!

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Two Words That Made Me Angry

First appeared at DennisGingerich.com on December 7

Up until a few weeks ago, two words have ignited very angry emotions inside of me.  This has been going on for the last ten years.  It all peaked at a recent funeral for a long-time pastor friend of mine.  At least three times that day, long-time acquaintances asked a variation of those two words, “How’s retirement?”  Earlier that week, a local business leader asked the same question at a Chamber of Commerce luncheon.  It’s been a regular question for years.  But, four times in one week?  I was internally seething with anger by the week’s end!  As I was reflecting, I became aware of all the red flashing lights and the dangerously peaked gauges on my emotional dashboard. Getting ready for church on Sunday morning, I made a decision.

That next week, I scheduled an appointment with a psychologist friend who leads a counseling and consulting team connected to our church.  I needed to explore why those two words kept on detonating an emotional bomb inside of me?  Two words that were most likely intended by the questioner to show an interest in my life, were causing me deep distress.  Why this internal over-reaction to another person’s innocent interest in my well-being?  For a few decades, I’ve known that I should always question a disproportionate reaction to an event, activity or words.  That’s true when observing the reaction of others and it’s also true of myself. 

Unpacking this volatile internal emotional response to a simple inquiry of “How’s retirement?” has led me to five observations about myself and my inner values:

  • I Dislike Assumptions.  While I did carefully plan and orchestrate a leadership succession plan, I’ve never retired. I’m still working full time.  People assumed that changing my role from Senior Pastor to Founding Pastor and calling a young successor to be the Lead Pastor at Cape Christian ten years ago meant I had retired.  Few asked me for clarity on my current role.  They assumed.  A mentor told me years ago to just divide the word assume into three parts:  Ass-U-Me.  That’s what happens when you or I assume.  It makes both of us look like donkeys. 
  • I Dislike Gossip.  I’ve spent the last decade responding to the hated two-word question with, “Where did you hear that I retired?”  In most cases, the response was “someone told me you did.”  No one asked me.  No one checked out the facts.  They just passed on an untruth.  That was a part of my anger. 
  • I Dislike Mediocrity.  I have always been drawn to visionary out-of-the-box leadership. Long-sighted leadership that plans for a preferred future is one of my strengths.  Not thinking ahead and defaulting to “whatever happens” is less than what God has designed us for.  Middle-of-the-road average leadership always disappoints me.  In my way of thinking, developing a succession plan for the organization that you birthed should just be a normal part of growing toward level five leadership.    
  • I Devalue Retirement.  I have come to realize my thoughts are counter-cultural.  Most every working American looks forward to the day they can sit and do nothing.  Not me.  Fishing, boating or golfing doesn’t appeal to me.  Even my hobby of photography doesn’t look good as a full-time option.  I guess I’ve watched too many retirees move to Florida and get super depressed.  In fact, as a police chaplain, I know the inside story.  Every year, dozens of retirees in our city commit suicide.  No purpose.  No meaning.  No hope.  Nothing to get out of bed for in the morning.  In contrast, I love what I do.  I love seeing the transformation of lives.  I love helping the team take new territory.  When someone thinks I’ve retired, that isn’t a positive step for me.  I’ve watched as people obsess about their retirement date—count it down on their smartphones; talk about it every single day to every person they meet; and they let up on the accelerator, put it in neutral and slowly coast to a stop.  Now, I plan to slow down and decrease the amount of time I spend in the office a few years from now.  But for someone to think that I retired at age 55 when I implemented the succession plan by moving out of the driver’s seat and taking another seat on the bus, goes completely against my values—because I don’t value retirement as my ultimate goal.
  • I Discovered That Few Understand the Cost.  As I reflected with my counselor, I realized that a significant part of my internal anger at the “How’s retirement?” question had to do with something I hadn’t verbalized publically.  I was angry that people potentially thought that I was so well-positioned with my financial resources that I could just choose not to work anymore and be set for the rest of my life.  That bothered me more than I was aware.  Quite the opposite.  By giving up the highest-paid position in the organization, I’ve significantly sacrificed financial security.  And there have been plenty of other less measurable costs to my ego by giving up control and taking a much less visible role in the organization I founded.  But I’m still convinced it was the right decision.  I have absolutely no regrets.  And the organization has prospered greatly because of the implementation of a succession plan.  

So, I’m doing better these days.  People continue to ask about “my retirement.”  But now, I don’t feel the rage rising up in the way that it use to.  In fact, I smile (I put on a fake smile before) and ask them where they heard that I retired?  I joke that “you can’t believe everything you hear.”  And I share that I’ve never retired and the truth is I’m still working full-time and I’m loving my role at this season of life.  I explain to them that I intentionally developed a succession plan for the well-being of the church that I started and it’s one of the very best leadership decisions that I’ve ever made.  And I encourage them to go to this Successful Successions blog and read more about it if they want to know the Why behind the What.  And some have.

Here’s my reminders for the holidays:  Life is too short to be angry.  Pay attention to your inner self.  Self-awareness is a treasured leadership skill.  Seek the counsel of professionals.  Have fun.  Humility is necessary for emotional health.  Let the Prince of Peace give you His peace.  Merry Christmas!

What areas of your emotional health do you need to be in tune with these days? What is your next step in getting healthier? I’d love to hear more!

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Which is Most Important?

Recently I read something that got my attention:  “Team leadership requires an understanding that impact is more important than ego. In American Christianity, especially in the megachurch, the ego needs of the senior pastor are off the charts, including me. Pastors have to let God lower their need for attention. The minute that impact becomes more important than ego, amazing things begin to happen” (Ray Johnston of Bayside Church in CA).  I had to ask myself, which is more important to me?  Impact or ego?  What would your answer be for you?  Impact or ego?  What would others say about me or you?  Impact or ego?

I’m hopeful that most would say that my life reflects a higher value on impact than ego.  In my mid-60’s, it is easier to measure than when you are in your mid-30’s.  For me, there is more of a track record.  More to measure.  Patterns can be noticed.  In other words, I’ve left a trail behind me.  What will people see when you have a long history behind you?  Impact or ego?

I have lost track of the number of times that leaders in business, church and non-profits have said something like this to me, “What you’ve done with your succession plan is so unusual.  I’ve never seen anything like it.”  And, I guess it is.  I didn’t do it to be unique or different.  I didn’t do it because I wanted someone to think I was extraordinary or special. I did it because it just seemed the right thing to do if I wanted to leave the maximum impact through my leadership in the organization that I started. 

I remember well the story that John Ortberg tells about playing Monopoly with his grandmother.  After working super hard to finally beat her and win the game, she said to young John, “It all goes back in the box.  All the cash.  All the properties.  All the accumulations of success.  It all goes back in the box” (here’s a 3 min. video version).  That’s the approach of someone who understands impact over ego.  It all goes back in the box.  

What are you doing in your leadership to maximize your impact?  Let me just suggest.  The greater you hope your impact to be, the more you will have to fight against your ego.  Those two are almost mutually exclusive. You can have great impact and a great ego.  But I would contend, your impact will soar upward in almost direct proportion to your ego going downward.  Humility is the doorway to maximum impact. Think about.  Better yet, work on increasing your impact by decreasing your ego.

Have a great week!  

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10 Things I’ve Learned About Succession

It has been 10 year since I made one of my best-ever leadership choices. In 2009, I implemented a succession plan for the organization I founded in 1986. It’s a plan that was 5 years in the making.  Very close to committing myself to follow Jesus, marrying my wife and starting Cape Christian, this decision has been in my top 5 all-time best.  Earlier this year, I wrote an extended version of these reflections on the last decade (if you remember them, skip to number 6)

1. Intentional Legacy-Leaving is Rewarding – Tom Mullins, author of Passing the Leadership Baton wrote, “A transition will be one of the greatest tests of your leadership, but it will also serve as one of the greatest rewards and testimonies of your legacy.”  Real. Truth 

2. Level-Five Leadership is the Pinnacle – Jim Collins, John Maxwell and others speak of the pyramid of leadership that peaks at level 5 where you serve others, empower those under you, give away leadership, hand credit to the team, take responsibility for failures and demonstrate deep humility.  I’ve diligently pursued the quest to climb to the top. Level 5 leadership is worth the climb.

3. Long-Term Success is Superior to Short-Term Wins – 20 years into starting and leading a church, I dreamed of building an organization that would outlive me.  I dreamed of a church that would go faster and farther after I was out of the driver’s seat than when I was in it. Now, 10 years and three successors beyond the plan implementation, I can actually attest to the fact that those first two decades of many small wins have been far surpassed by the long-term success of an organization that is now ready for the long-haul.  I am absolutely sure, if I died today, Cape Christian would continue to accelerate in its growth and impact for many more decades to come.  My dream is now reality.

4. The Mission is Bigger Than Me – I could have said and meant it early in my leadership journey.  But it’s different to finally and completely grasp it.  To start something and lead something that is much bigger than me, is incredible. There’s nothing more humbling and fulfilling.

5. My Fruit Tastes Better on the Trees of Others – I have always loved Bob Buford’s desire to have his “fruit to grow on other people’s trees.”  Seeing the results of leadership development and the establishment of a culture of an intentional mission and purpose doesn’t just look nice on the trees of others, it even tastes better.  I especially love the fruit of what I’ve planted when I see it coming off the trees of my successors and bringing nourishment and joy to thousands.  That is even more satisfying than when they used to feast on what I produced. 

And now, a few more months of reflections have added a second five to those first five:

6. Succession is Rare—I knew it but didn’t know it.  I had trouble finding good models before I developed a succession plan. But I thought I just wasn’t discovering them.  10 years later, I’m amazed at how many people have never ever heard of anyone doing what we’ve done, especially in a church setting.  When they hear the Cape Christian succession story, they often tell me they have never met anyone who has successfully done what we’ve done.

7. Succession is Misunderstood —The repeated assumption is that I retired early at 55 and turned over the organization to another leader. Peers, friends, acquaintances and even extended family have asked me, “How is retirement going?”  So many have difficulty grasping that I stayed on the team, but I no longer lead the team.  Or to put it in Jim Collins language, “I stayed on the bus, but I’m no longer in the driver’s seat.” Because it is so rare, I’m guessing people don’t have a slot in their brain to put a strategically developed and implemented leadership succession plan.  To me, that needs to change.

8. Succession is Challenging – If it was easy, more people would do it.  There’s no comfort in growth and no growth in comfort.  There are many challenges: ego, finances, clearly defined roles, comparison, potential conflicts, triangulation and more.  I say, “Pull up your big-boy pants and face the challenges.” Every persevering, maturing, and healthy leader should be able to navigate the tests that come.

9. Succession-Planning Takes Time – Many overwhelmed leaders think they can’t add one more thing to their schedule. It does take time.  It took me five years to put a plan in place.  Lots of reading, conversations, prayer, intensive internal reflection, and consultation with others was important.  Many leaders I know just won’t make it a priority of time and energy.  But as always, the best things in life take intentionality and effort. You can’t coast and climb to the top of the mountain.

10. Succession Takes the Wisdom of Others – Our succession plan at Cape Christian wouldn’t be the success story that it is without a lot of help from a lot of people.  Lloyd Reeb of Half-time coached, encouraged and inspired me.  My friend, Greg Kappas, listened to me and my successee as we processed the possibilities.  His feedback and connection to one leader in California who had done it was helpful.  My “Monday Morning” local pastor’s group that I’ve done life with for over 23 years gave invaluable wisdom.  Our church board engaged in the process with their counsel, adjusting our bylaws and risked the future of the church by moving into uncharted territory.  I learned from the leaders and books mentioned earlier in this blog.  My wife, Linda, gave incredible support during the planning and over the years since.  Don’t try it alone.  Outside perspectives are priceless.  

I believe this.  Forward-thinking leaders plan for both their future and for the future of the business, non-profit or church they lead.  

NOTE: If you need any assistance in planning, let me know and I’ll do my best to point you in the right direction!  My email address is Dennis@SuccessfulSuccessions.comif you want to reach out.
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Are You Cutting the Tall Poppies?

NOTE: An earlier version of this blog was posted on my www.DennisGingerich.com blog on July 5, 2019.

A while back, I read about a phenomenon called the “tall poppy syndrome.” Evidently, it used to be a common Australian farming practice to cut off any poppy that grows above the rest. Regrettably, this practice is not limited to just poppy farms. It’s a common practice most everywhere.  I’ve seen it in workplaces, politics, families, communities and churches.  

It seems to me, our shifting cultural climate toward boldly posting our unabashed opinions and rants on about any topic, has increased this phenomenon. I see a growing trend to attack, criticize, and resent anyone who has talent or achievements that sets them apart from others. This tendency extends to those who resent the efforts of leaders who challenge the status quo. Opponents of change initiatives often attempt to marginalize leaders by attacking their character and questioning their motives. If the messenger is flawed, then the message and vision they offer cannot be trusted. As disappointing as it is, these challenges come with the territory of leadership.

To be totally fair, this isn’t a brand new practice.  Apostle Paul of the first century was very familiar with this kind of character assault. He frequently encountered mean-spirited opposition from those who questioned his motive and his methods. We get a sense of the content and the intensity of these attacks from his response to those accusations in a letter he wrote to the Jesus-followers in the Greek city of Thessaloniki:  “For our exhortation does not come from error or impurity or by way of deceit; but just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not as pleasing men, but God who examines our hearts.  For we never came with flattering speech, as you know, nor with a pretext for greed–God is witness–nor did we seek glory from men, either from you or from others, even though as apostles of Christ we might have asserted our authority.”(1 Thessalonians 2:3-6).

The list of culpabilites against Paul was quite extensive and severe: error, sexual impurity, deceit, flattery, and greed. I don’t have space here to go into these allegations and how the Apostle responded to each one.  But a careful study of the scriptural text reveals that Paul persevered amidst these attacks and demonstrated the purity of the motives that guided his leadership.

Let’s bring it home.  Have you ever been “the tall poppy” at school, on a team, in the community, in your family, or at work? Did others try to “cut you down” because of your talent, idea, vision or position?  How did you respond? I wrote about one of my “tall poppy” experiences in another blog post. It was very uncomfortable.  It still makes me think twice before taking risks because I wonder how I’ll be perceived by my peers and colleagues.  At the very least, I’m still sometimes hesitant to share with others any of my bold ideas or plans.  How about you?  How have you responded?  How have those experiences tempered your audacious decisions and actions?

And finally, be brutally honest.  Have you ever been so filled with jealousy that you tried to cut the tallest poppy in your field? Maybe you pointed out that person’s flaws and failings to others.  Maybe you derided their idea or decision as ill-advised or just plain ridiculous.  Maybe you dug your heels in and refused to join the vision.  I’ve been there and done that.  I’ve learned you don’t make the world brighter by blowing out someone else’s candle.  And, I am also learning that the more I grow in my emotional and spiritual health, the easier I can celebrate the successes of others. 

A pivotal part of my leadership journey toward leaving a lasting legacy was to develop and implement a succession plan in the organization I founded. (That’s what this entire website is about: successful successions in business, non-profits and churches). I can now look back and see that the five years during the planning process and the ten years since the implementation of that succession plan has been a testing-ground experience for me to make significant progress in weeding out the tall-poppy syndrome from my first and foremost reaction reservoir.  

These days, I’m much more grateful for the beauty of tall poppies.  It adds such dimension and splendor to the field. 

QUESTION:  As you consider either your response to being the target of others attacks or your own resentment of others achievements, what is God nudging you about in your attitudes and motives? What adjustments is He prompting you to make?

If you are okay with it, you are welcome to share more in the comment section below.
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My Favorite Guy

This post was first seen in my blog at www.DennisGingerich.com but it seems very appropriate for this particular blog focused on succession planning.

Next to Jesus, there’s a guy in the Bible who is one of my all-time favorites. Maybe it’s my season of life and ministry, but this guy is now at the top of my list.  When I was a kid, it was Daniel.  Spurred on by a Sunday School tune, “Dare to Be a Daniel,”I loved Daniel because of his bravery in the face of lions and more.  Of course, maybe it was because Daniel is my middle name. But honestly, my all-time favorite now isn’t Moses, Abraham, David, Daniel, or Paul, it’s a guy who is mostly known by his nickname, Barnabas.

About a year ago, I remember reading something that Jo Saxton wrote about Barnabas and it resonated with me as to why this guy is my hero.  His name was actually Joseph.   But he was so defined by his attitude and actions that they called him the “Son of Encouragement,” or Barnabas.

Jo Saxton’s commentswere about Barnabas responding to the exponential growth in the first century church by constantly celebrating it through giving up money, control and even his own reputation so the growth was never hindered.  Saxton’s challenging question to leaders was, “can you celebrate what God is doing in others on your team or in another church in your community?” My gut level response to that question was, “Usually!”

I think this Barnabas-like natureis one of the strengths God has developed in me over the years.  I’m grateful that I “usually” look for what God is doing and celebrate it rather than being so insecure I have to shut it down or highlight my past successes to “one up” someone else’s current victory. I’m confident it’s connected to the reason I planned and implemented a Successful Succession leadership plan 10 years ago at the church I founded.

But, back to Barnabas.  He first shows up in Acts 4 where he sells a field and gives the disciples the money and he doesn’t insist it gets used for a specific project.  In Acts 9, Barnabas risks his reputation on a newbie, named Saul, giving him access to other church leaders and asking those leaders to take a risk and give this new guy (later named Paul) a chance.  

A little over a decade ago,I had an “aha” moment when I discovered that Luke always used Barnabas and Paul’s name together (in that order) into Acts 13 and then switched it from Acts 14 and beyond to Paul and then Barnabas. It’s a picture of their changing notoriety.  I believe Barnabas understood that lighting another person’s candle didn’t blow out his own.  In fact, it never hurts us when we celebrate the potential and the successes of others. 

Barnabas willingly took a brash, bold, brilliant guy named Paul, and raised him up into prominence. We see it with Barnabas and John-Mark, (who completely messed up), and Barnabas personally coached him back to success. I find this fascinating.  There is no New Testament letter or book named after Barnabas. But the imprint of his influence is throughout the New Testament because, without Barnabas, would there be a Paul and would there be a Mark? 

I pray that my legacyas a leader is that I put this Barnabas characteristic into practice. This is what I know. It requires me to be generous and secure enough to share my life, my stuff, my gifts, my opportunities and my mission with others.  It requires that I give away without expecting anything in return. Am I ready for that? Can I invite people into leadership and help them get there, even if I become less and they become more? Can I invite people alongside me in mission? This always sounds lovely until you have to do it.  But then that person’s got something I don’t have or is doing something I may never do. Can I still celebrate that? I pray I will be known as one who lived up to the example of my favorite guy.

QUESTION:  How are you wrestling with this challenge of being Barnabas-like in your leadership? I’d love to hear more.

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Top Level Leadership

 

It didn’t matter who, what, when or where.  A Sunday afternoon Monopoly game with my brother and cousin.  A six-man flag football game at my three-room country school. The 50-yard dash in the state-wide Junior Olympics.  High-school basketball. Hiking to the top of an Oregon butte, a sand dune or a Pacific Ocean overlook. I love to get to the top of the mountain for the first view. I grew up with a love to win.  Continue reading “Top Level Leadership”