Tag: level 5 leader

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7 Learnings From 7 Decades

It is true.  My birth certificate, passport and driver’s license all agree.  I’ve lived 7 decades.  Most of the time, I don’t feel like what I imagined 70 to feel like when I was in my 50’s.  But, it is true. I’m there.  I could write 70 things I’ve learned in 70 years.  But you wouldn’t read them.  So, maybe you will read just these seven.

Live Authentically – The easiest thing to be in the world is yourself.  The hardest thing to be is what others want you to be or to try to mimic someone else. Your fingerprints are uniquely different from the other 8 billion people on this earth. Just be yourself.  Be in tune with your values and passions.  Learn what fulfills you.  Prioritize what brings you peace.  Self-awareness is one of the keys to living authentically.  

Live with Intentionality – Purposeless living is meaningless living.  I’ve spent at least the last 50 years being very intentional about my relationship to my wife, Linda.  Linda and I were intentional with parenting our three children.  We were purposeful about starting a church that had a clear mission and focus.  We’ve been deliberate about our health.  I’ve been specific as to how I would grow my photography skills.  I’ve embraced aging and planning for the legacy that I want to leave behind.  And by the way, intentionality should never be confused with intentions.  As Henry Ford said, “You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.”   

Listening is a Key to Success – There are many aspects and measurements for success.  I could list a dozen  reasons that success follows some and not others.  But the top one is listening.  David Augsburger, my wife’s late uncle, wrote it this way: “Being heard is so close to being loved that, for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.”  Leaders, parents, marriage partners, politicians and friends are successful when they learn how to carefully listen.  Listening to those different than you in age, views, values and beliefs. Listening matters. It really matters.

Love Unconditionally – This is how I’m loved by God. It is a life-long process of learning to accept and give that kind of love.  Love without strings attached is special.  Not based on what someone does for you in return, this love is selfless.  It’s the key to good mental, emotional and spiritual health.  Receiving and giving unconditional love provides a sense of security in both childhood and adulthood.  No human relationship is perfect.  So, accepting and giving unconditional love involves acceptance and forgiveness.  I’ve discovered that only God can ultimately give us the strength and inner resources to love this way.

Letting Go Can Be Better Than Hanging On – This can be counter intuitive.  We naturally want to hang on to the familiar and comfortable.  It takes courage and self-awareness that something is not serving us anymore.  For me, it started with a decision to either stay at home in Oregon and go to a local college or move across the country and attend college and graduate school in Virginia.  While pastoring my first church in upstate New York, there were decisions to be made.  Do I persevere beyond the seven years of a difficult and toxic environment or let go of the familiar to move 1,300 miles away to an unfamiliar setting to live out a life-long dream of starting a new church with no guarantee of success?  Again, after more than two decades of unprecedented growth and success, should I let go of my lead role in the organization I started to let an untested younger leader lead?  No matter if it is parenting children into adulthood, leaving the younger years behind to embrace the unknown of middle or mature years, letting go has ultimately proven to be better than hanging on.  There is power in letting go.

Learn How to Grow Your Fruit On the Trees of Others – This is one of my greatest joys at this stage of my journey.  Tasting the fruit growing on the trees of my successors and younger leaders is the best.  Recently, I was so awed to witness 20 of our top city leaders (city manager, fire chief, police chief, finance director, etc.) all listening to my successor teach on servant leadership at our monthly business leaders’ luncheon. For nearly three decades, I have planted seeds, watered them and tended to relationships with many of those leaders and their predecessors. Yet it was the growing connection of my successor with the current city manager that led him to bring his entire team to grow their leadership skills at our church.  To know that I planted seeds that have grown into productive fruit-bearing nourishment for our top city leaders and thousands of others every weekend is so much better than the limits of keeping it all for myself and doing it all myself.

Live With the End in Mind – Not just now at age 70, but for several decades, I’ve been asking this question of myself and many others at funerals I lead, “What do you want to be remembered for as a spouse, parent, grandparent, neighbor, leader?”  You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you could make decisions today that may very well change the ending.  If you only live in your default mode, you may not be remembered for what you wish. Forward-thinking legacy-leaving individuals and leaders plan for both their future and the future of things and people they value.  As a labor/delivery nurse for 33 years, my wife Linda always encouraged her new parents upon discharge from the birth center to remember “the future is in your hands.”  What outcomes do I want for this child, this family, this job, this role?  Habit 2 of Covey’s “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” is to begin with the end in mind.  This learning is pivotal for your physical, mental, emotional, relational and spiritual health.  It may sound obvious, but if you don’t have an end goal in mind, how on earth are you going to get there?

These seven learnings above, have brought me to a place of great contentment, inner peace, and satisfaction at this point of my journey.  Whether I have two years or two decades left in my journey, I’m filled with confidence that I’ve lived out God’s purpose for me well, I’ve left a significant contribution to those around me, and I have no regrets. So, on to the next decade of purposeful living!

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Two Words That Made Me Angry

First appeared at DennisGingerich.com on December 7

Up until a few weeks ago, two words have ignited very angry emotions inside of me.  This has been going on for the last ten years.  It all peaked at a recent funeral for a long-time pastor friend of mine.  At least three times that day, long-time acquaintances asked a variation of those two words, “How’s retirement?”  Earlier that week, a local business leader asked the same question at a Chamber of Commerce luncheon.  It’s been a regular question for years.  But, four times in one week?  I was internally seething with anger by the week’s end!  As I was reflecting, I became aware of all the red flashing lights and the dangerously peaked gauges on my emotional dashboard. Getting ready for church on Sunday morning, I made a decision.

That next week, I scheduled an appointment with a psychologist friend who leads a counseling and consulting team connected to our church.  I needed to explore why those two words kept on detonating an emotional bomb inside of me?  Two words that were most likely intended by the questioner to show an interest in my life, were causing me deep distress.  Why this internal over-reaction to another person’s innocent interest in my well-being?  For a few decades, I’ve known that I should always question a disproportionate reaction to an event, activity or words.  That’s true when observing the reaction of others and it’s also true of myself. 

Unpacking this volatile internal emotional response to a simple inquiry of “How’s retirement?” has led me to five observations about myself and my inner values:

  • I Dislike Assumptions.  While I did carefully plan and orchestrate a leadership succession plan, I’ve never retired. I’m still working full time.  People assumed that changing my role from Senior Pastor to Founding Pastor and calling a young successor to be the Lead Pastor at Cape Christian ten years ago meant I had retired.  Few asked me for clarity on my current role.  They assumed.  A mentor told me years ago to just divide the word assume into three parts:  Ass-U-Me.  That’s what happens when you or I assume.  It makes both of us look like donkeys. 
  • I Dislike Gossip.  I’ve spent the last decade responding to the hated two-word question with, “Where did you hear that I retired?”  In most cases, the response was “someone told me you did.”  No one asked me.  No one checked out the facts.  They just passed on an untruth.  That was a part of my anger. 
  • I Dislike Mediocrity.  I have always been drawn to visionary out-of-the-box leadership. Long-sighted leadership that plans for a preferred future is one of my strengths.  Not thinking ahead and defaulting to “whatever happens” is less than what God has designed us for.  Middle-of-the-road average leadership always disappoints me.  In my way of thinking, developing a succession plan for the organization that you birthed should just be a normal part of growing toward level five leadership.    
  • I Devalue Retirement.  I have come to realize my thoughts are counter-cultural.  Most every working American looks forward to the day they can sit and do nothing.  Not me.  Fishing, boating or golfing doesn’t appeal to me.  Even my hobby of photography doesn’t look good as a full-time option.  I guess I’ve watched too many retirees move to Florida and get super depressed.  In fact, as a police chaplain, I know the inside story.  Every year, dozens of retirees in our city commit suicide.  No purpose.  No meaning.  No hope.  Nothing to get out of bed for in the morning.  In contrast, I love what I do.  I love seeing the transformation of lives.  I love helping the team take new territory.  When someone thinks I’ve retired, that isn’t a positive step for me.  I’ve watched as people obsess about their retirement date—count it down on their smartphones; talk about it every single day to every person they meet; and they let up on the accelerator, put it in neutral and slowly coast to a stop.  Now, I plan to slow down and decrease the amount of time I spend in the office a few years from now.  But for someone to think that I retired at age 55 when I implemented the succession plan by moving out of the driver’s seat and taking another seat on the bus, goes completely against my values—because I don’t value retirement as my ultimate goal.
  • I Discovered That Few Understand the Cost.  As I reflected with my counselor, I realized that a significant part of my internal anger at the “How’s retirement?” question had to do with something I hadn’t verbalized publically.  I was angry that people potentially thought that I was so well-positioned with my financial resources that I could just choose not to work anymore and be set for the rest of my life.  That bothered me more than I was aware.  Quite the opposite.  By giving up the highest-paid position in the organization, I’ve significantly sacrificed financial security.  And there have been plenty of other less measurable costs to my ego by giving up control and taking a much less visible role in the organization I founded.  But I’m still convinced it was the right decision.  I have absolutely no regrets.  And the organization has prospered greatly because of the implementation of a succession plan.  

So, I’m doing better these days.  People continue to ask about “my retirement.”  But now, I don’t feel the rage rising up in the way that it use to.  In fact, I smile (I put on a fake smile before) and ask them where they heard that I retired?  I joke that “you can’t believe everything you hear.”  And I share that I’ve never retired and the truth is I’m still working full-time and I’m loving my role at this season of life.  I explain to them that I intentionally developed a succession plan for the well-being of the church that I started and it’s one of the very best leadership decisions that I’ve ever made.  And I encourage them to go to this Successful Successions blog and read more about it if they want to know the Why behind the What.  And some have.

Here’s my reminders for the holidays:  Life is too short to be angry.  Pay attention to your inner self.  Self-awareness is a treasured leadership skill.  Seek the counsel of professionals.  Have fun.  Humility is necessary for emotional health.  Let the Prince of Peace give you His peace.  Merry Christmas!

What areas of your emotional health do you need to be in tune with these days? What is your next step in getting healthier? I’d love to hear more!

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Fruit On Other People’s Trees

One of my mentors-from-afar changed his address last year.  Bob Buford moved from his earthly home near Dallas, TX to his heavenly home at age 78 on April 18, 2018.  I always admired Bob.  A successful business leader, Bob leveraged his visionary wisdom, leadership skills and generosity to significantly contribute to three major landscape shifts in American Christianity.  He was a founder of Leadership Network—helping larger growing churches and their leaders ramp up their ability to be more innovative and entrepreneurial so they could multiple their Kingdom impact (our church was one of those).  Bob also wrote the best-selling book “Half-time” (which greatly influenced my life) and started the Halftime Institute to help business leaders make second-career shifts from success to significance.  And a third contribution, was the launch of the Drucker Institute, to help non-profit organizations learn top-level management skills.  Buford’s later life mission was to “transform the latent energy of American Christianity into active energy.”   

Bob Buford

Bob Buford had a saying about wanting his “fruit to grow on other people’s trees.”  Bob constantly invested in the lives of leaders.  He had a unique way of influencing high-potential leaders to expand their capacity and then empower them to flourish in their unique calling and gifting.  He loved to see the success of others. Bob always avoided taking credit for the success of something he initiated and when someone would try to hand it to him, he would quietly point upwards and whisper “Yay God.”

I’ve never personally met Bob.  I’ve read his books.  I’ve been personally mentored by one of his mentorees, Lloyd Reeb. I’ve been personally inspired, challenged and encouraged by Leadership Network staff: Linda Stanley, Dave Travis, Warren Bird and more.  And I’m grateful that his fruit has grown on my tree.  And actually, Bob Buford’s writings and influential organizations are my primary inspiration for loving to see my fruit growing on other people’s trees. Developing and implementing a succession plan in the church I started, can be traced back both directly and indirectly to Bob Buford. Now, my fruit is growing on the trees of my successors. 

Philippians 2:3-5 contains Bob Buford’s core values:  3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus.  Not always easy, but absolutely necessary—if you plan to see your fruit growing on other people’s trees.

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Top Level Leadership

 

It didn’t matter who, what, when or where.  A Sunday afternoon Monopoly game with my brother and cousin.  A six-man flag football game at my three-room country school. The 50-yard dash in the state-wide Junior Olympics.  High-school basketball. Hiking to the top of an Oregon butte, a sand dune or a Pacific Ocean overlook. I love to get to the top of the mountain for the first view. I grew up with a love to win.  Continue reading “Top Level Leadership”

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Level 5 Leadership

 

Over three decades ago, I heard one of my earliest leadership mentors, Dr. John Maxwell, speak about the five levels of leadership. He described them this way:

1) POSITION (Rights) People follow you because they have to.

2) PERMISSION (Relationships) People follow you because they want to.

3) PRODUCTION (Results) People follow because of what you have done for the organization.

4) PEOPLE DEVELOPMENT (Reproduction) People follow because of what you have done for them.

5) PINNACLE (Respect) People follow because of who you are and what you represent.

As a young 30-something church planter, I set my sights on Level 5. Continue reading “Level 5 Leadership”

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I Have a Dream

 

I was almost a 10 year old. We had no television in our home at the time. Growing up in a rural farm community of Oregon, I had no idea that history was being made on August 28, 1963 on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, DC. Across the country that day, Martin Luther King, Jr., was leaving a memorable mark on the civil rights timeline of the United Stages. The imagination of civil rights activists and sympathizers, was captured with the leading line of the entire last half of Dr. King’s speech—“I have a dream…” Continue reading “I Have a Dream”